We all have been there (both male and female, I suppose).
We are in a group of people, strangers / friends, it doesn’t matter who they are.
And you’re wrapping up a bible study or retreat..then the question is asked..
“Does anybody have any prayer requests..?!”
Your hands get clammy, your heart skips a beat and you start to get a cold sweat.
You remember what you did last night…even at church camp, or from the comfort of your room/dorm.
The glowing screen still haunts you, still.
In fact, it almost shames you to open your laptop or cell phone anymore..
Everyone goes around, some mention they need freedom from pride, from chains of guilt, shame…etc.
Your turn is coming up..your heart thumps even harder.
You just know people can see your heart beating at the side of your neck.
BOOM!
Your turn.
“I…uhh…I am really bad at looking at (wo)men in a sexual way, I struggle with lust..”
To yourself, you know the truth.
You allowed your eyes, body and heart to feast on porn last night…and many nights prior.
But yet, we call it lust.
WHY?!
Can we call it what it is?
I get it, lust is in the same ‘category’ as porn – but porn does something else to us rather than lust.
We actually see the images that our minds crave…we see the actions being played out.
And our brains, body and flesh LOVE it.
We committed adultery.
Nasty. Gross. Shameful.
Forgiven.
Christ says:
“..I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” in Matthew 5:28
But scripture also says:
“..confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed.” in James 5:16 and that is massively hopeful!
Not being upfront and honest with our sins is doing us a massive disgrace.
We are to confess sin to one another…all of it.
Trust me, I’ve used the ‘lust’ card over and over and over.
I am sick of doing it.
This is the start of something new…calling it what it is.
Being open about my struggles.
Being real.
Who’s in this with me?
johnwylie.co 
I agree! I also have struggled with lust and porn. One thing I notice also is that is so easy to access since we have mini computers in our pockets. One thing that has helped me is to surround myself with people that will hold me accountable. By having those people in my life I’m able to contact them when the temptation comes knocking on the door.
I have a serious 20 yr addiction to porn and I need help/prayer. I keep promising God this is the last time. Then I fail and hate myself. I’m so sick of this vicious cycle! Thank you for sharing and praying!
I have struggled with this myself too, and sometimes still do. I think one of the struggles is that wherever you look or go there’s something porn-related… Even when you go on certain websites you see ads with a a body half naked, or if you go outside you see huge advertisement boards with a woman almost naked… It’s really hard in a society that thinks it’s ‘normal’ and ‘ok’ to provoke these thoughts.
Praying for everyone who is going through these addictions and struggles! May God help them overcome.
Word.
Hey John. I know what it feels like. The shame, the guilt. The burden that weighs on your shoulders that you can’t seem to shake. The endless attempts to finally go free. I’ve been through it all, but I want you to know that things can be different. There is hope. You can find true and lasting freedom from this – God is that good! It’s not about “struggling well” or learning how to manage sins. You can live in the complete freedom and healing that God has for you. He’s done it for me and dozens of other men that I know personally. More and better life awaits you!
Lust is something that should not only be discussed among men but also women. Every time when guys told this problem out, I wondered why there was no girls like me that had this kind of trouble. Last time while we were having the girl-only talk, the consoler mentioned that and for the first time I admitted that I had that problem. I knew that was sin but was too shy and embarrassed to admit it.
So here I raise my hand and say that I’m in need, too. I need God to purify my eyes and minds. I need Jesus to wash my guilt away when it comes to lust.
I found this entry to be poignant and insightful. Many Christians struggle with this and quietly carry the burden and shame on a daily basis. I would assume that Christians and non-Christians deal with this, however; as Chritians we are called to a higher standard. “The world” may not feel the conviction and weight of this topic. I have many friends who are not Christians and are not convicted. In essence, simply a (destructive) way of life. Thank You for stepping out and writing on this.